It's been a busy few weeks--a lot of work, some travel, some helping my parents as their house undergoes repairs from the recent flooding. But even in the moments of free time I've had, I've just not felt inspired to write. I know that all writers experience writer's block and experience times of drought and doubt, times of not knowing what to write about or uncertainty that what is on their minds is worth sharing. Still, it's frustrating to go through these times of feeling like I have nothing significant to say.
As a writer, I want my words to be helpful and encouraging. But I'm realizing that that doesn't necessarily mean that they have to be positive. I think that's what sometimes hinders me from writing--I have things to share that I can't just wrap up neatly with a bow and a happy ending, not yet anyway. It's easy to share the victories; it's much harder for me to share the defeats and discouragement.
Last night at our life group we talked about various Biblical figures who inspire us. I shared that David inspires me in particular in the Psalms he wrote, in that he wrote of his doubts and fears and sense of abandonment by God just as often as he wrote of his trust and hope in God to come through for him. He was not afraid to share all of his emotions--the good, the bad and the ugly. Reading his intimate, gut-level honest thoughts inspires me to strive to have that same open communication with God first and foremost, and with others as much as possible. After all, God did not gift me with the ability to write just for myself, but to edify and exhort and encourage others.
So even though I may not always like what I feel compelled to share, I know I need to be willing to share thoughts and experiences--the good, the bad and the ugly--as God prompts me to do so. It's not easy for me to open myself up; it's painful at times. But I think it can be cathartic as well.
